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Monday, August 2, 2021

List: Ten little ways I know that I'm getting older, at the ripe age of 33!

 I'm about to tell you all something that I never advertise in real life.  I know, what else is new, right?!  Today is my birthday!  Once August 2nd began, so did my 33rd year of life.

Instead of getting all depressed at another year of my youth passing before my eyes, I decided to take a different path.  Today we'll be talking about all the silly things that remind me that I'm getting old older.

funny memes quotes about getting old

Ten little ways I know I'm getting older.


1.  "Woke" people make me want to take a nap.
In a world where it's trendy to be woke, all I want to do is sleep.  I can't understand this culture that strives to be offended at every little thing while bullying everyone that doesn't share their offense.  We, as a society, need to stop being so damn sensitive.  Another part of the woke culture is hypocrisy, social media tough guys, and the inability to think for oneself.  Now, go take a nice long rest, before you become permanently WOKE and crazy!

2.  A fresh, new sponge makes me way too happy.
Remember your younger years when you never really cared about the life expectancy of a sponge?  At the ripe, older age of 33, those days of being blissfully unaware of a dirty sponge are GONE.

3.  I find modern cartoons absolutely ridiculous.
As a child and maybe into my early twenties, I enjoyed a good cartoon!  They're lighthearted, fun, and the really good ones would make me laugh.  These days, I sit with the kids after they turn on cartoons and I want to gouge my eyeballs out!

4.  Toys like Smooshy Mushys make me talk about money trees.
Remember when you were young and you asked your parents for something only to hear the lecture about money not growing on trees?  Yea, well, that's officially me.

5.  I naturally check out the dads these days.
Whenever we watch something on TV, I'm constantly overlooking the hunky star of the show.  Instead, my eyes go straight to the father figure to see if they meet my taste.  This became blatantly obvious when my daughter and I were watching Walker.  While I was silently DROOLING over Jared Padalecki, my daughter kept swooning over the future son in law.  When I told my daughter, she gave her opinion with no filter.  "You're just SO OLD, mommy".  ...just stick a knife through my heart, honey.  It's totally fine...

6.  Poop is now so whatever to me.
While I get that this is an odd one, let me explain.  Remember in your teenage years you would scoff at the idea of changing a diaper or gasp clean up an accident?  These days, my son can literally shit on the floor and I'll just put it in the toilet like everything's fine.

7.  My favorite store to browse in is Homegoods.
Back in the day, I would go to the mall and spend hours in Victoria's Secret, Forever21, Bebe, and Guess.  These days, when I do go shopping, it's to walk through the aisles of Homegoods and touch everything that I want to buy but know I don't have room for.

8.  I only buy clothes that strategically hide side boob and back fat.
When I was younger, I was a FIT skinny mini.  I remember the days when I would wear a bikini and think I was fat from seeing a little cellulite.  Oh how I wish I knew that was as good as it would ever get.. In my older age, I look for bras with extra wide bands so that they don't cause unnecessary fat rolls under my shirt!

9.  I wash disposable silverware.
I used to tease my aunts when they would complain about tossing a plastic fork after one use.  I mean, isn't that the point of them?  Well, here I am washing plastic forks with the same care as my silverware.  Why do I do that?  I don't really know.  It just feels like the right thing to do.

10.  I spend my days watching the birds from my office window.
There's really nothing more to say after that statement, is there?!  I cry...

What silly thing reminds you of your age?

12 comments :

  1. 33 is as far as I remember the last year that doctors still consider you young, after that you are a mature patient for them. If you get prego after that you are an older prego lady for them. Jesus' years I guess. I did read somewhere that they want to change it so that young people will be all the way up to 65.

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    1. LOL Well, they changed it here that 65 is still considered young. The CDC made that adjustment a few months ago. No more being prego for me. I'm done done done!

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  2. Happy birthday


    Woke culture is it's own strange monster. It doesn't make much sense most of the time

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  3. Happy Birthday! I'm glad I've lived long enough to try to be woke. You are younger than my younger child, who turned 35 on July 31.

    Love,
    Janie

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    1. Happy belated birthday to your youngest! If you have to try and be woke, chances are you aren't. I'm not talking about open minded people, I mean the people that are so brainwashed that they can't even see reason. After reading your blog all these years, I don't get that sense from you at all. :)

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  4. I hope you had a great birthday!
    And I totally, 100% agree with you on this list. I feel like we'd be great friends if we lived closer together. You could be my HomeGoods buddy, especially now that Pier 1 is gone. Jason would be thrilled not to have to accompany me LOL!
    I check out the dads too. I know that Ashton Kutcher was supposed to be the hunk on The Ranch, but good lord I wanted less Ashton more Sam Elliott. He's the epitome of a silver fox!

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    1. Oh, I could use a Homegoods buddy! Pier 1 was my favorite. I've already lost two Pier 1 finds that I'm super sad about b/c I know they can't be replaced. :( hahahaha Yesss to the silver fox!

      Thanks for the birthday wishes. :)

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  5. I include animated movies in number 3. Can’t stand them! I agree that a fresh sponge rocks, as does all things clean. Lol on woke people making you nap. It’s funny, but I notice a definite age mark in my kids with that. The 31 YO thinks it’s ridic, but the younger two buy into it. Or maybe it’s just being a parent and you don’t have time for it!?

    Sitting on the floor for an hour and then getting up reminds me of my age which is old!

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    1. And happy birthday! I mentioned on Instagram that my latest grandchild was born yesterday on our anniversary! I’m babysitting the other two, so exhausted, but thrilled!

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    2. Congrats on the newest addition to your family!

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    3. Congratulations, again! I hope we get to see some pictures of the bambina soon. :)

      LOL @ the getting up off of the floor! That's a good, physical reminder. hahaha

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