Thursday, August 16, 2012

Dating: Millionaire Match

Have you ever gone to a place where rich folk flock?
…I do. Manhattan and The Hamptons are two of my favorite places to visit…
You dress all fancy and practice rich people etiquette.
You learn to hide your expressions and be a little snobby.
Ok, so I fail at the second part and end up giggling!!
Every time I participate in one of these outings, I wonder what it would be like to not pretend.
What would it be like to actually sit there with a millionaire date sipping on a mimosa?
If you know the answer to that question, please share below! I’m dying to know the rich people juice!!
That’s when I decided that I would try and find a rich person to take me out.
The problem was that I had no clue where all the high ballers were out hiding!!
...ok, so I knew they were in Manhattan and The Hamptons. But that just wouldn’t work for me…
That’s when I discovered
It’s an online dating website where only the richest of the rich hang out.
The website makes all sorts of claims to be the dating home of many celebrities and millionaires.
Charlie Sheen was even rumored to be on there. Talk about a convincing fact!
After checking out the website, Peaches and I whipped out our credit cards.
We paid therich person fee $50 and signed up to be listed amongst the rich and famous.
Goodbye a week’s worth of gas or a new pair of shoes!!!
After a whole month of rocking, I found not one person that was worth an e-mail back.
Everyone on there was more than three times my age or from a faraway land.
Everyone that messaged me was overweight, middle aged men looking for a little girl to spoil!
This website is what I call a rich person date fail!!!!
That’s when I realized that maybe I should stay out of the millionaire dating pool.
Did you ever try to date for money?

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Life: I need to breathe!

I'm sure you've all noticed that Jax has been pretty much missing in the blog world!
Although she has been trying real hard to keep up with you guys and your blogs!

For those of you who have noticed my absence, I am very much alive.
I'm alive and well.  I'm just really, really busy!
...but busy in a good way.  I totally love it...

Jax, what exactly have you been up to that has been keeping you from us?
I knew you all were concerned!!  No worries guys, I'll let you all know!

1.  School
The genius in my head told me to take a summer class to get a few credits out of the way.
Turns out squeezing a whole semester into a four week course is similar to ancient Chinese torture!
The fact that the first draft of my final was due by the second week of class was a great hint!

2.  Work
I've been working ridiculous hours because of internal changes within my company.
On top of my daily tasks, I have been given the workload of a second employee!
Goodbye blogging time during work hours!

3.  Family
My family has been sucking my very little spare time dry.
Between dinner dates, parties, chasing mice, and just spending quality time together, I've been booked!
These aren't complaints.  I love every minute of my family time.

4.  Boyfriend
I've been seeing someone new and really enjoying it.
Juicy details?  Eh, not yet!

5.  Vacation
Next week I will be taking a full weeks vacation to lounge on the beach and get some sun.
Because of this, I've had to be working double time on my personal errands to prepare.
Ohh, how I can't wait to get a tan and spend some girl time with my Mommy and SuperDebbie!

I apologize to everyone who's blogs I have been neglecting.
I'll be working super hard this week to catch up with you all!

In the meantime, please excuse my lack of posts.
I have a lot of things going on and am running out of time to do them!
If you really, really miss me then just shoot me an e-mail.  I always respond :)

What has been eating up your time this summer?

Thursday, August 9, 2012

Dating: The Scale System

Whenever I first start dating someone new, I get real excited.
Quickly following the excitement comes the anxiety.
As you guys know from this post, I am a really, really anxious person!
That anxiety quickly turns into a million questions.
Does this guy really like me?  Maybe he just wants to get laid?  Perhaps he’s really married with kids? 

After my mind starts racing I do what any reasonable person would do.
I call my mommy.
Oh, shush.  You know you do too!! 

Usually she has some kicking advice that I really take to the heart, but this time she failed me.
She introduced me to a system that she refers to as “The Scale”.
This is when you take 10 different aspects and rate them on a scale of 1-10 for you and for the potential date.
After you rate everything you add up the scores and compare.
This is supposed to let you know whether or not you are out of your date’s league.
Since when are there really “leagues” out there?  I go for what I want and never pay attention to that! 

Let’s use Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes as an example.
Yes, I know they broke up, but they are what first came to mind! 
Appearance:  Tom Cruise – 6 vs. Katie Holmes – 9
Style:  Tom Cruise – 7 vs. Katie Holmes – 9
Career:  Tom Cruise – 10 vs. Katie Holmes – 8
Crazy Religious Psychopath:  Tom Cruise – 1 vs. Katie Holmes – 8
Tom Cruise – 24 vs.  Katie Holmes – 34

…and the winner is…Katie!!!

You know what Jax says to this scale system?
Well first she said “phooey” and made the wtf face!  Then she said…
Jax thinks this whole system is ridiculous. 

The Scale is just an excuse to feed your own insecurities and make yourself feel lower than you are.
Everyone is equal when you scale out different aspects.
Where one lacks in one department they will be able to pick it back up in another.
…or maybe I’m just trying to make myself feel better after my score…

 Do you believe in “the scale” system?

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Happy Birthday!: Jax

Today I turn the ripe old age of 24.
For the love of God, I feel old!

Happy Birthday Jax!
That was R&W doing the wishing.  I totally was not talking to myself…

This past year has been full of many things good and bad.
I’ve met some new, lovely people and I’ve lost some others.
I’ve had exciting, fun adventures and I’ve had some crisis.
I laughed a lot but I also cried a little.
Since we don’t dwell on the negative here, that’s the end of the comparisons!!

The Top 10 Best Moments of 23 for Jax!
…because I’ll never be 23 again…

10.  Apartment
I moved out of my old apartment that I shared with The Viking to live on my own.
It was the start to a new type of independence and it ignited the fire to burn a big bridge!!
Hello snazzy new place and GOOD RIDDENS to LLS!  Remember him?

9.  GodSon
I developed an even deeper relationship with the baby boy, my GodSon.
I’ve watched him grow mentally and physically.  The memory of his 2nd birthday will always stay with me!
Nothing can make me smile quicker than when he calls out for me by saying “Jacket!!!”

8.  TheLoveBug
TheLoveBug got smacked around quite a bit this year, but she also got a makeover!
TheLoveBug got eyelashes and a full body lift this year.  She’s prettier than ever!
Well, until those bastards stole half of one of her lashes and I had to wish diarrhea upon them.

7.  Kathy Bates
I’ve seen her nude while flashing the good goods in a video with Jack Nicholson.
I never laughed so hard then when I HAD to Google it late at night with Madre and Biff!!
It may be silly, but it has been talked about at every family function since!

6.  The Avengers
The best movie from my 23 years of life came out recently.
The Avengers rocked the theaters and got me screaming!!
Screaming with joy and excitement at the super heroes and the hunky men.  Yum!!

5.  Superbowl
My NE Patriots may have lost the Superbowl to the NY Giants this year, but it was fun to watch!
It’s not every season that you get to cheer your team on to the very end.
Hello Aaron Hernandez!  You’ll get them this year.  I know you boys got it ;)

4.  Red Head
I went red head for a little while this year!
It was fun to change my hair color and treat it with things like whale sperm and placenta.
Don’t judge me…

3.  New Friends
I’ve made several new friends and acquaintances this year.  It’s always good to meet new people!
I’ve met a few crazies like EggMan, but I’ve met a few people whose friendships I will cherish for life.
Yes, that includes you, Pat Hatt!  We had an awesome experience in NYC for a week!

2.  College
I went back to college in pursuit of my bachelor’s degree in Accounting.
Going to a new school introduced me to a couple new friends and taught me many new things!
Isn’t it weird how it actually feels good to get back to school when you are older??

1.  Blogging
I started blogging around my birthday last year.
I’ll remember my age of 23 as the age that I got involved with Raviolis & Waterworks.
It’s given me something to look forward to and opened doors for me.  I also discovered a passion; writing!
The best part of blogging has been meeting and getting to know all of you!
Thank you all for making the year 23 one to remember for me!  Ok, now wipe those tears from your eyes…

What has been the best part of this year for you?
…and thank you all in advance for the birthday wishes…

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Dating: Insecurities

When you first start dating somebody it’s common to feel insecure.
I know I do.  Suddenly I hate my hair, want to lose a few pounds, and decide I need a new wardrobe!
I always thought that these insecurities were typically a girl thing with very few men in between.
Turns out I was wrong.

Newsflash Ladies:  Men are just as insecure as we are.
I’m not sure why I’m so happy about this, but this fact makes me feel a little better!

The problem with being insecure is, women are attracted to confident men.
When we are with a guy who exudes confidence it sort of rubs off on us.
I mean, if a man is really confident then he must be confident in his decision to take me out.  Right?  Right?!
After talking to a few of the men in my life, I came up with a list of ways for men to “fake” confidence.

10 Ways for a Man to Fake Confidence on a First Date

10.  Grooming
The best way to feel confident is to properly groom yourself.
If you’re looking good then you’ll feel just as good.
Get a fresh haircut, make sure your clothes are neat, and make sure that you’re smelling good!

9.  Agreeable
It’s nice when you share similar views with someone, but to agree with everything is near impossible.
If you are seconding everything that I say, I’m going to think that you don’t have a mind of your own.
It’s never bad to express your own opinion.  When it’s done in a friendly manner, no one can be insulted.

8.  Voice Volume
Mumbling can be taken as a sign of insecurity.  Yelling can also be viewed as insecure or overcompensating.
Keep the volume of your voice to a reasonable tone and talk in a way that you always do.
Unless you are Italian.  We can’t help but yell.  We don’t even know that we’re doing it!!

7.  Time
Keeping an eye on the clock or the door means that you want to leave.
You’re showing your date that you’re either insecure and ready to run or you’re not interested.
We’re out!  For the love of God, just enjoy it!!!

6.  Critical Thinking
Don’t sit there and pick apart every little thing.  Enjoy the moment and don’t worry about the flaws.
When you are picking apart your personality, a previous date, or even a conversation we are left questioning.
Most of the time these critical thinkers bring things to my attention that I would never think of!  Stop it!!

5.  Breathe
If you’re not sure that your breathe is fresh, then you’re going to be keeping your distance.
Keeping your distance could be misread for insecurities or lack of interest.
Men, brush those teeth and gargle with Listerine!!  Also, steer clear of stinky foods for the night, please!!

4.  Bully
Putting everyone around you down is a sign that you’re insecure of yourself.
Try and remain positive to reinforce positive thinking.
I mean, who wants to sit with a bully or a Debbie downer anyways?  Not Jax…

3.  Eye Contact
When a man can’t keep eye contact with me it’s never a good sign.
The fact that you’re talking to me and looking down either means you’re lying or that you’re intimidated.
Too insecure to look me in the eyes?  Fake it and stare at my eyebrows.  I’ll never know!!

2.  Grilling
Avoid asking your date a billion questions.  Nobody wants to be questioned like they are on trial for murder.
Keep the questions appropriate and to a minimum.  Too many questions are a key to insecurities.
I mean, do you really want to know how many men she’s dated anyways?  It’ll just feed it more!

1.  Be You
As cliché as this sounds, make sure that you are your normal self.
Pretending to be something else is unnatural.  We could tell and sniff that insecurity from a mile away!
Besides, acting different to impress a date is lying.  Don’t try to trick a woman into wanting to be with you.

How do you try and act confident on a date?


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I'm a dedicated mother, wife, employee, student, blogger, and a true Long Islander in every way!


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