Very Superstitious, writing on the wall...

I woke up this morning and put on my NE Patriots socks.  I did my makeup with a smokey eye of dark blue and silver.  I even updated my Facebook status to cheer on my boys.  Today was the big game between the NY Giants and the NE Patriots.  I was so sure that my Patriots were going to demolish the Giants.  (If you guys only knew the amount of shit I talked today...Sigh..)  Long story short, despite all the positive energy I sent New England's way, my team still lost.

Aaron Hernandez #81, Yum!

While Hernandez, Welker, and Gronkowski pulled their end, Ochocinco messed up a few important plays.  (I think that Ochocinco should give back Hernandez's original number.  He doesn't deserve it.  How do you miss EVERY throw Brady passes to you?)  Now that my phone stopped blowing up from all the Giants fans rubbing the devastating loss in my face, I can finally get to the point.  Did I actually jinx my team or is all that superstitious crap bologna?


Toof, toof, toof:  That is the sound of someone spitting.  When I was in my long term relationship with The Greek, I learned about spitting to ward off the "Matee".  The Matee is the Greek evil eye.  Greeks believe it to be a jinx that someone can put on someone else.  In order to ward off the devil, the matee, or whatever other weird thing was attacking them at the moment, they would spit onto the floor.  (I'll never forget the first time that I walked into that door and I got spit on.  I mean, really?  In America if you get spit on you better be ready to fight!)  So maybe this is where I messed up.  I should have spit on the TV because the damn Matee made my football team lose!!

Knock on wood:  Everyone's heard of this one.  In order to stop yourself from jinxing something or someone, all you need to do is knock on some wood.  (I strongly believe in this one.  I knock on wood several times a day!  Even if there is no wood present, I knock on something because I figured that effort has to count at least a little bit.)  Each time that I talked crap to support my team I was inadvertently jinxing them!  I assure you, this was not my intentions.  From this point forward, I will carry around a slab of wood to knock on each time that I make a comment.  Sorry Brady, it won't happen again...


Itchy limbs:  If your hand itches that is supposed to predict some sort of fortune coming your way.  If your foot itches it is supposed to predict some sort of journey (hopefully a vacation!)  that is in your near future.  There is a catch to this omen.  If you actually scratch your itch, then the good fortune that your limb was giving you is now null and void.  (Imagine winning the lotto as being part of your destiny.  Well, now that you scratched your palm you will never see that fortune!  Heed my warning and fight the urge to scratch!!!)  Ok, now you are all going to think I am nuts.  All day long I had this horrible itch on my elbow.  I assumed it was dry skin from the cold weather so I scratched and then put some cream on it.  What if an itchy elbow predicts that your football team is going to lose?  Horrible.  I should've never scratched...


I'm not sure if you all believe in superstitions and omens, but I take no chances.  You well never see me walk under a ladder or break a mirror in fear of 7 years bad luck.  For the love of God, I won't even step on a crack out of fear of breaking my mother's back!!  No joke!  I sleep in a room with a dream catcher to put an end to my nightmares.  There are little crosses made from blessed palms in every room of my house.  I even have a chinese marble held in place by metal hands in my car to bring about good luck.  (The poor Love Bug could use as much luck as it can get!)  There is a little figurine of an elephant facing the door in my bedroom to bring good luck in my life.  Before I officially date someone I compare our Natal charts to make sure that we are compatible.  (Everyone should be doing that one.  The natal charts have NEVER proved wrong before.  They were screaming out all sorts of warnings with the psychotic LLS.  The one time I didn't listen, figures!)  


I could keep going, but you get the point.  I'm a superstitious person.  What superstitions do you follow?  I would also like to extend a sincere apology to the NE Patriots and all their fans for jinxing their win on tonights important game.  The lesson has been learned and appropriate measures (like carrying around a slab of wood!) will be put in action starting next week.

-LMF

Not to put any blame on my Aaron Hernandez, but maybe that little eating chicken thing you did a couple of weeks ago aided the jinxing.  Please, before next week, knock on some wood and "toof, toof, toof" in the locker room.  Just sayin...