Thursday, August 9, 2012

Dating: The Scale System


Whenever I first start dating someone new, I get real excited.
Quickly following the excitement comes the anxiety.
As you guys know from this post, I am a really, really anxious person!
That anxiety quickly turns into a million questions.
Does this guy really like me?  Maybe he just wants to get laid?  Perhaps he’s really married with kids? 

After my mind starts racing I do what any reasonable person would do.
I call my mommy.
Oh, shush.  You know you do too!! 

Usually she has some kicking advice that I really take to the heart, but this time she failed me.
She introduced me to a system that she refers to as “The Scale”.
This is when you take 10 different aspects and rate them on a scale of 1-10 for you and for the potential date.
After you rate everything you add up the scores and compare.
This is supposed to let you know whether or not you are out of your date’s league.
Since when are there really “leagues” out there?  I go for what I want and never pay attention to that! 


Let’s use Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes as an example.
Yes, I know they broke up, but they are what first came to mind! 
Appearance:  Tom Cruise – 6 vs. Katie Holmes – 9
Style:  Tom Cruise – 7 vs. Katie Holmes – 9
Career:  Tom Cruise – 10 vs. Katie Holmes – 8
Crazy Religious Psychopath:  Tom Cruise – 1 vs. Katie Holmes – 8
Tom Cruise – 24 vs.  Katie Holmes – 34

…and the winner is…Katie!!!

You know what Jax says to this scale system?
Well first she said “phooey” and made the wtf face!  Then she said…
Jax thinks this whole system is ridiculous. 

The Scale is just an excuse to feed your own insecurities and make yourself feel lower than you are.
Everyone is equal when you scale out different aspects.
Where one lacks in one department they will be able to pick it back up in another.
…or maybe I’m just trying to make myself feel better after my score…

 Do you believe in “the scale” system?

47 comments:

  1. No. See, I'd be a ten in every category and no man will ever measure up. Lol Not really.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL That's the spirit, Miranda ;)

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  2. Replies
    1. Hmm...I still disagree. You can't put numbers on attraction because it's different for everyone.

      Delete
  3. That's the problem with women. Give a guy a decent chance instead of trying to fit him into an imposible scenario given to you out of some Elle magazine or Redbook or whatever it is you gals constantly read. THEN in turn, guys might actually give you gals a fighting chance instead of trying to make you look like the hot chicks inside those very magazines you read, hahaha.

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    Replies
    1. That can go both ways, Bama! Us women can look at those sexy underwear pictures of David Beckham only to look away at the average man. There is nothing wrong with men or women looking as long as they know that isn't a real life situation.

      I think the scale system is just a silly way to justify things. You can maneuver those numbers however you want to make them fit any situation.

      Delete
  4. I think the scale system is a load of bs, shhhh don't tell your mother hahaha

    As anything and everything can be put to scale and moved up or down and all around should you look hard enough and it all depends on people and opinion and all that other fun stuff. all relative, seem to say that alot lately hahaha

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    Replies
    1. LOL Wait until I tell Madre, she's going to tell Pat Hatt to run around a bush. hahahaha I kid, I kid!

      I totally agree with you :) and, yes, we have been saying "it's all relative" a lot. LOL

      Delete
  5. And here is where our age difference shows, my dear...I am with your mom on this one. Or maybe it isn't the age difference but the fact that I, too, am the mom of children in the dating world. There is a Scale. You are always rated higher on that Scale than anyone else, just so you know, so be sure to allow for the curve...

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    Replies
    1. Really??? Well, Madre will be pleased to hear that at least one person was on her side. lol

      So how does this "curve" work? I might need to adjust my entry to fit that!! lol

      Delete
  6. These dating scales go against what dating is suppose to be. in other words, just date and see what happens.

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  7. This is an interesting way to look at potential dates!

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    Replies
    1. Interesting is one name for it... lol

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  8. I am not a fan of the scale either. I am a fan of hang out with someone in person a few times and see how you FEEL. You can make all the, "I need this in a guy" rules you want, but those can all fly out the window if someone is right.

    I detest dating. I'm trying to go with it again but all of these people are just reminding me how truly difficult it is to meet a great person.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree with your view on the scale. The whole thing is just crazy to me, but then again, some people really live by that!

      You detest dating? I would have never known!! lol Mr. Right is going to come along and be just as amazing as you are!! I know it :) :)

      Delete
  9. The scale system reminds me of grade school when all the girls would rate the boys, and vice versa. I always got bad ratings, and the one or two girls that gave me good ratings apparently did it out of pity, because they didn't seem to like me very much. (Of course you are not supposed to know what people rated you. It's supposed to be a secret ballot..but somehow it gets out.) So, I vote NO to the scale system.

    I find it humorous how all of Tom Cruise's ex-wives are publicly offering emotional support to Katie Holmes. She's the one dumping him, but she is the one that gets all the support... like she has just suffered through a hurricane, or national tragedy or something. Apparently, being married to Tom Cruise must be quite an ordeal.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ^The first paragraph makes a lot of sense. It's like forcing someone to vote. It's like forcing us boys into systems we hate in the first place.

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    2. I was never cool enough to get a vote..but that's ok, because rating people isn't nice. Unless Jax is doing it...then it is totally awesome.

      Delete
    3. I would never rate people on a scale like that! I don't like it. Who are we to judge other people???

      But, Jimmy, you would totally get a 10. Just sayin!!! :) :) lol

      Delete
  10. The scale system wouldn't work for me, but I do find I have a mental checklist. Is he tall enough? Yes, proceed to number two. Does he have teeth? Proceed to three. Does he live with his mother? Is he gainfully employed? Does he have a micropenis? yada yada yada. You know, just the important questions.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Mental checklist? We're females!! We're supposed to be guilty of this!!

      P.S. I just added teeth as a necessity for me as well. lol

      Delete
  11. You call your mother Jax and that speaks well of you. So many girls don't and get themselves into horrible messes because of it. The Spawn doesn't have a scale system per se but she has extremely high standards which no man has managed to yet meet. I'll never have grandchildren at this rate!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. unless you get Jonathan Rhys Meyers to date Spawn, darling :)

      Delete
  12. what? There are dating leagues? And scales? Pfttt.... I refuse to believe in any system and scale which would tell me I'm not Jason Statham's match.... pffttt again and pffft again....

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  13. The scale system is a load of crap. haha First off, you have to have a good opinion about yourself to even have a hope of it working (and soooo many people have low self esteem or think they're perfect so that won't work). Secondly, style and appearance shouldn't be equal to personality and intelligence. Thirdly, somebody can have perfect style, looks, and intelligence... and be a complete wackadoo but everything else would have gotten them a high score so sanity (or lack thereof) wouldn't make much of a difference to the numbers. lol

    The best thing you can do, as corny and over-used as it is, is follow your heart.

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  14. I don't actually believe in the scale system. I think it's about chemistry and personality.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Oh, gosh, no, I don't believe in the scale! Sorry to your mom :) Finding the right person is too much about that unexplainable connection you have with the 'right' person for you to be able to make it into something mathematical. I've known guys who were PERFECT on paper, but I just didn't feel anything for them. Plus, even if the scale were true, it would take out the magic and I definitely like the magic :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm with you. I'm terrible on paper but quite a catch in real life....

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    2. I'm with you. I'm terrible on paper but quite a catch in real life....

      Delete
  16. Definitely do not believe in the scale system!

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  17. There is a scale system, but people generally don't use it for dating...

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  18. Ooh, that sounds like an awfully bad idea. I'm sure if I used a scale like that I'd either end up using it to talk myself out of relationships, or to convince myself I'm totally unworthy.

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  19. I don't bother with things like that. I try not to get worked up and anxious over things.

    If there's something I can do about it, why worry? If there's nothing I can do about it, what's the point of worrying?

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  20. Do I believe in the scale system? On a scale of 1-10, I'm at about a 5.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Clarification - I'm at about a 5 whether I believe in the scale system, not a 5 on the dating scale itself.

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    2. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  21. Mm something tells me a good score depends on what I choose to make my list look like. Let's see:
    Great driver: ex 0 blue one 10.
    Money: ex 7 blue one 10.
    Fantasy: ex 0 blue one 10.
    See.. I'm the winner. So how come she left me?
    I remember:
    Shopping: ex 10 blue one 0.
    Love babies: ex 10 blue one minus 10.

    I rest my case. Don't takes yr Mom's advice on this one, Gorgeous. Follow yr instinct. :)

    ReplyDelete
  22. Mm something tells me a good score depends on what I choose to make my list look like. Let's see:
    Great driver: ex 0 blue one 10.
    Money: ex 7 blue one 10.
    Fantasy: ex 0 blue one 10.
    See.. I'm the winner. So how come she left me?
    I remember:
    Shopping: ex 10 blue one 0.
    Love babies: ex 10 blue one minus 10.

    I rest my case. Don't takes yr Mom's advice on this one, Gorgeous. Follow yr instinct. :)

    ReplyDelete
  23. Ummm the scale system doesn't seem all that realistic to me. Maybe if a third party were to put it into place - but as long as it's done by one of the two involved... well... it's just too easy to tweak it however you want!

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  24. I think it makes sense if you're in a This is War situation trying to decide between two men. Otherwise, use with caution.

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  25. I love that at such a young age you see that the scales do balance out when all things are taken into consideration (unless of course the guy has really bad breath...then you need to run, Jax!).

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  26. Definitely don't believe in the scale system. You are either into someone or you aren't.

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  27. i actually dont believe with scale system!

    xoxo,Meg

    ReplyDelete
  28. In celebrities- yes! Because they're easy to judge (and kinda fun), but in real life and serious situations- nope :)

    ReplyDelete

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